Low Self Esteem

Lost in a world of judgmental folks, branding

and stereotypes, lies a beautiful rose whose

petals have been frayed. Drowning in her own

insecurities and depression, she constantly puts

herself down and seeks approval from others.

She doesn’t feel smart enough for anything.

She doesn’t feel good enough for anyone.

She doesn’t feel talented enough to try anything.

She doesn’t feel pretty enough for anyone.

Mocked because of the way she looked.

Apparently, she didn’t fit societal beauty standards.

Through the streets, boys mocked her carnal fortress,

juggled her private parts in a game of lust and lies.

Using love as a scapegoat just to use her and discard

her like used condom wrappers.

She never thought that she was good enough for anyone.

She thought that she was ugly and useless.

The reflections in the mirror distorted her thoughts

and perceptions on beauty, mocking the lines on

her skin with each caress. Playing cheap to seek

attention, oozing of desperation and insecurity.

Fitting into trashy clothes just to look sexy.

Accommodating and caressing all forms of

disrespect just to get a little love.

Basking in self hate and enabling bad behavior

for a little happiness.

Trading her natural beauty for cosmetic surgeries

and traces of silicone, butt augmentation just to

fit into society’s standards of beauty.

A beauty battling an identity crisis, a walking

stereotype.

She hated herself so she traded her natural

beauty for a dummy moment of satisfaction.

She hated her body so much that she fed it with

piercings, tattoos and surgical procedures just

to conform to the socially constructed ideas of beauty.

Clumped with layers of cake on her face, a radiance

that illuminated at dawn when they looked into her eyes.

Smile that created an assumption that she was happy.

A low self esteem’s illusion of self actualization and

fulfillment. A sufficient physical facade for the world.

No one saw past the wasped exterior.

She projected what she wanted the world to see.

Obsessed with her looks, afraid of her own inconsistencies.

A fleeting beauty crumbled in fear in her awake-ness.

A weakness that broke her confidence and provoked

mixed feelings of anger, pain, desperation and fake happiness.

Unaware of the beauty inside, a dazzling through each word

she spoke; with intelligence and truth never faltering.

Kindness through her actions. Radiance that defines her as

a beautiful woman, a Queen.

Turning her scars into stars, she learnt to appreciate herself.

Turning her flaws into blessings, she learnt to love herself.

Rebuilding her self esteem, valuing herself as a woman.

Reinstating confidence and respect.

Loving herself with her imperfections.

Re-branding herself as a woman.

A strong, beautiful, respectable woman.

Never less, much more.

© FloetryC 2015

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Author: AfroetryC

I am an African woman and a mother to a precious little angel. I love to use the term "Afro-floetic Queen" mostly to describe my poetry and my roots. I love poetry...art, soul music and inspirational bits of knowledge to offer advice and counseling to those who need it. I can be very witty, straight forward but fun. Ha. ha... A colorful perception of the world - expressed in my poetry. I want to inspire people with my Poetry...give them hope, while also advising them. Life is a learning process and i am happy when one of my pieces directly affects or inspires one of my readers. Let's take a detour around experience, and let me fill your minds with sweet poetic juices.... Note: Just changed my user name from FloetryC to AfroetryC because the latter is more personal and describes my Spoken Word Poetry better.

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