Life is a masquerade party, a play
Like a game of cards, there are losers
and winners and i was not winning
in this game.
The stakes were high and i didn’t
read the rules.
I ignored the red flags in the cynosure
of our eyes.
I didn’t understand the bet, so i
submerged my identity beneath a new
persona that gravitated towards him.
I allowed him to breathe new life into
me and dictate the way i lived my life.
I served him a tasty plate of my
uniqueness and the woman i used to
be disappeared internally and somehow
my individuality got stored in a mental
Somewhere in between loving myself
and loving him too much, i got tangled
in the passage of time and lost myself.
My whole world rotated around him
and i viewed myself through his eyes.
His opinion of me was like powder
foundation and make-up concealer
carefully smudged to hide my blind
spots – neatly placed over my
imperfections and insecurities.
His words shaped my thoughts and
perceptions as i became a mirrored
image of him in the eyes of society.
I succumbed to my owns fears and
insecurity and became the woman
I found myself on the lonely, weary
road of depression and near insanity;
crying at the junction between my
conscience and self consciousness as
i rummaged through the remains in
I stood helpless as the wind blew the
pages of my emotional encyclopedia,
reminding me of my loss.
I allowed myself to drown in an illusion
and i lost myself in the process of loving
him that when he left, i thought my world
The world breathed clarity that beautiful
sunny day, ushering in a wave of sweet
I found a new feeling of self worth as the sun
caressed my skin and the wind whispered
my name in a prelude, in reference to love.
The loss i felt dissipated to nothingness as i
looked o’er my shoulder and voila!
Beyond the horizons… my hopes, dreams
and opportunities leapt for joy.
I was pleased because i understood what
it all meant.
It reminded me of my gift, and uniqueness-
a powerful woman with a rich identity who
no one can control.
I was like the phoenix bird, rising out of the
fire and reclaiming my identity, owning
my sense of individuality as a Spoken
More than a woman, much more than my
mistakes and imperfections, more than
just a pretty face and curvy body.